| toxic_kisser ADD ME! |
[Monday, November 8th, 2004
@ 4:04pm] |
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mood |
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 happy |
] |
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music |
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Avril Lavigne - "How Does It Feel" |
] |
Aight this is my last post in this journal...
ADD ME!!!
toxic_kisser
Thats my NEW LJ.
Love,
Alicia
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[Monday, November 8th, 2004
@ 3:17pm] |
ok... I'm going to make a new LJ I think... I have deleted all the entries since I met Jack... and I'm going to leave it that way... ERASED... This is done with... ill post my new LJ name soon.... but erase this one... I might just delete it.. not sure yet....
bye,
Alicia
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| Song lyrics i felt like posting so DEAL! |
[Sunday, October 31st, 2004
@ 3:06pm] |
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mood |
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happy |
] |
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music |
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look at my entry fucker! |
] |
Rumors
by Lindsay Lohan
Saturday, steppin' into the club
Maybe somebody wanna tell the DJ to turn it up
I feel the energy all around
And my body can't stop moving to the sound
But I can tell that you're watching me
And you're probably gonna write what you didn't see
Well, I just need a little space to breathe
Can you please respect my privacy
Why can't you just let me
Do the things I wanna do
I just wanna be me
I don't understand why
Would you wanna bring me down when
I'm only having fun
I'm gonna live my life (not the way you want me to)
I'm tired of rumors startin'
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lyin'
Sayin' what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
Why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is
So, here we are back up in the club
People taking pictures
Don't you think they get enough
I just wanna be all over the floor
And throw my hands up in the air to the beat like (what)
I've gotta say respectfully
I would love it if you take the cameras off of me
Cause I just need a little room to breathe
Can you please respect my privacy
Why can't you just let me
Do the things I wanna do
I just wanna be me
I don't understand why
Would you wanna bring me down
I'm only having fun
I'm gonna live my life (but not the way you want me to)
I'm tired of rumors startin'
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lyin'
Sayin' what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
Why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is
I just need to free my mind (my mind)
Just wanna dance and have a good time (good time)
I'm tired of rumors (rumors)
Followed (followed, followed, followed, followed, followed)
What they want of me
Why can't they (they, they, they, they, they) let me live
Take this for just what it is
I'm tired of rumors startin'
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lyin'
Sayin' what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
Why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is
I'm tired of rumors startin'
I'm sick of being followed
I'm tired of people lyin'
Sayin' what they want about me
Why can't they back up off me
why can't they let me live
I'm gonna do it my way
Take this for just what it is
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| x-mas shopping |
[Sunday, December 21st, 2003
@ 10:53pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 exhausted |
] |
| [ |
music |
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my immortal.. evanescence |
] |
well kristine came over today and we hung out for a few hours and i helped her film her spanish project.. lol that was funny. Then me my bro, and Sue went out to the mall to do christmas shopping for my mum and my dad... me and cj bought sumthing for each other in walmart after.. lol we know what we got each other.. lol he was so funny in the store lol... it was to the point where i was crying cuz i was laughing so hard.. that kid is funny LIKE WHOA..lol... good times lol good times... I have one major prob though... I CANT FIND KRISTINES PRESENT!!! AHHH lol thats a huge prob.. that was sum big money.... grrrr.. lol ill find it soon.. (wow look how responcible i am lol) only 2 more days of school left.. whoop whoop! lol its late so im out peace!! lol
p.s.... me and kristine talked to rihana and i think we got the whole cutting thing under control.. im thankful.. and if we didnt... then ill try harder.... with all my friends...
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| yay what a fun day |
[Saturday, December 20th, 2003
@ 8:19pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
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"my immortal"~ evanescence |
] |
well my day was awesome till tonight.... i mean last night i went to the mall with Kristine and talked to balcom, jon, and josh...(which yes... made me happy) then today i went shopping with my mom and visited my cousins, then i come home to... OH YEAH BY THE WAY ALICIA, ANOTHER ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS CUTTING HERSELF! WTF... this is what? number SEVEN! oh yay.. how fun... way to go people..... apparently my friendship means nothing if your willing to throw away everything i've done and scarificed for ALL OF YOU!!! Why do people have to be selfish and want to throw their lives away? I dont get it, why are seven of my friends trying to throw away their lives when some people, like my grandma, who struggled for 5 fucking years trying to beat cancer... but it won... she wanted to live, but look how selfish that is to throw away something that means so much to people who want it, but cant have it.... i'd love to know why your all doing it.. give me ONE.. just ONE good reason why.... look around at all the people who love you and care about you... dosen't that mean anything?
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| wow |
[Wednesday, December 17th, 2003
@ 7:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 accomplished |
] |
| [ |
music |
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"my immortal" ~ evanescence |
] |
Last night the tree fell for the FOURTH time lol ugh yes this is the fourth time we have decorated the christmas tree this year! WOOP WOOP ugh.. what a pain!.. the tree is like split up the middle lol... Kristine was absent for 3 days this week... AHHH... and Kazumi was out sick too... NOT COOL!! NOT COOL AT ALL! School was BORING. I saw Balcom twice today and both times we said hi to each other... oh the progress we're making lol. WOW i like him a lot... hmm i got SO MUCH DAMN HOMEWORK AND IT SUCKS LIKE WHOA!! UGH well i have to take a shower and then do more of my 20 pages of homework... and thats no exaggeration.. theres seriously more then 20 pages... like 21...lol and kristine is doing to well... shes really upset and it sucks to see her like this... im trying to help but idk so im out ttyl buh byez
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| sorry bout this bad habit of NOT updating |
[Monday, December 15th, 2003
@ 7:12pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 determined |
] |
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music |
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powerless ~ nelly furtado |
] |
i've been bsy lol sorry... anyways, Friday i went to a KICK ASS party lol.. OMG it was wicked fun... I wanted to go to another one on saturday but the girl said that she invited too many people...idk w/e.. i ended up babysitting these 4 kids.. ugh that sucked SOOOO bad... I got 40 bucks tho.. i guess that was aight? idk w/e... I HAVE A HUGE PROB THO.... I LIKE RYAN BALCOM.... but im not sure if i have a chance with him or not... THIS SUCKS... he's WICKED funny (like me), he's really nice and to top it all off, he's hot as hell.. All of my friends think i should go for it, and a few of his friends do too... i just dont wanna get hurt again. That would suck so bad... seriously. But a lot of people say i should give it a try cuz he might like me?!? who knows? You guys are so damn confusing.. ha. Kristine likes my choice in Balcom cause im always happy when i talk to him, or see him. He IS an AWESOME guy though... I would love to kno why he's single lol. Some people have said that he knows i like him... i dont care.. i just want him 2 like me 2! ahhh grr.. im confused... im out i gotta do homework.
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| whoa |
[Tuesday, December 9th, 2003
@ 2:37pm] |
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mood |
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 angry |
] |
yeap my plan was messed up....he ended up dropping off 2 other people... i wasn't talking at all.... aw well he's gunna drive me home sum other time since we're like 5 minutes away from each other... im just pissed cause i was all ready to do it and then people came i was upset... ugh.. and all that stressing all day for no damn reason... DAMIT.... ugh aw well... I WILL TELL HIM... just need another chance.. this sucks like whoa.. ugh.. im out later
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| sucky life lately |
[Monday, December 8th, 2003
@ 7:15pm] |
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mood |
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crushed |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Here without baby~ 3 doors down |
] |
welp i found out on saturday that Cory.... yeap.. him and Janelle "kinda have a thing going on right now" so i guess everything he said wasn't true?..... and man he told me stuff that made him seem like he was soooo into me.... i don't get it... this sucks so bad... Today i asked him if he was still gunna drive me home from school tomorrow and he said yeah.. then asked if something was wrong....i said no... but theres DEFINATLY A WHOLE LOT WRONG!I just cant tell him...How much it does hurt.. ugh but hes giving me a ride home, ima tell him how i feel and shit... not like its gonna mean a thing 2 him but hey.. i tried at least.... right? GRRR "love" sucks..i hate this.... Kristine is trying to hook me up with Balcom.. YEAH rightttt.... no chance there... whatever im out life sucks more and more everyday
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| half day |
[Thursday, December 4th, 2003
@ 9:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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disappointed |
] |
| [ |
music |
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"Who will I run to?" |
] |
Hey... sorry about not updating for a while.. i've been busy. Well the beginning of the week was awesome... till today... I was talking to Janelle and she said that she had something to tell me but i'd be crushed... Great! Just Great! woo hoo, someone can shoot me now cuz nothing goes right... I will NEVER have a boyfriend.. nope never oh how fun. You know you gotta like the idea of being single for LIFE! ugh.I'm seriously like in love with this kid (cory)and i hate it.. i have NO chance, so why am i still throwing myself at him... I'm gunna talk to him and tell him how i feel, which i know has a 99.9% chance of NOT going good... OH JOY!... My life sucks once again. And today Kristine was real upset to... I just love it when my best friends are hurt... GRRRR. Well the only good part of the day was when Me, Kristine, and Josh went 2 Deli King for breakfast. mmmhmm.. thats it.. oh and here's something from the man himself...
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: soo umm how bout them backstreet boyzzzzz
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: they kick ace
JoDaddyPuffCake: :-D
JoDaddyPuffCake: yeah they do
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: cuz josh....
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: i want it that way
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: hahaha
JoDaddyPuffCake: lol
JoDaddyPuffCake: but we
JoDaddyPuffCake: are 2 worlds apart
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: lol
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: can't reach to your heart?
JoDaddyPuffCake: cuz i want a fat babe
BuBbLe5 2 9 4: lol
JoDaddyPuffCake: biggy fries!
JoDaddyPuffCake: every steps like an earthquake
JoDaddyPuffCake: super size!
lol wow... ha...im out...
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| mommies b-day |
[Friday, November 21st, 2003
@ 10:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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exhausted |
] |
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music |
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"The Voice Within" ~ Christina Aguilera |
] |
today was my mums b-day.. like everyone of my friends told me to say happy b-day 2 her lol ur all so cute.. he he. umm we ordered pizza and had some cake... then i went 2 walgreens to get her a b-day gift.. i got there and realized that my money fell out of my pocket, so me and suzie went looking everywhere for it, then headed back home where i found it in the driveway... BLONDE MOMENT! lol so then we went back and saw my babe again.. and paid for the "facial" thingy .. she loved it.. im so awesome..lol then i came back and talked 2 Kristine.. we were ditched by the group 2night.. so tomorrow we be ditchin them.. lol whatever.. Cj.. omg Cj.. lol he came home on crutches today... he spells dumbass..j/p lol but wow man u blonde... he completly screwed up his ankle playing basketball, he went up for the rebound and like rolled his ankle... its wicked swollen and hes in a lot of pain so we're taking him 2 the emergency room for X-rays tomorrow..lol welp that concludes my fun-filled day lol i am tired as hell though.. ugh EXAUSTED byez
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| today.. just another day |
[Thursday, November 20th, 2003
@ 10:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 stressed |
] |
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music |
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"bright lights" ~ matchbox 20 (Cory)= ( |
] |
yurp.. the title pretty much explains itself.. i was a lil better today, i got better in spanish cuz of bob and aaron.. lol ty guys. Tam Tam.. "smile"..lol see it works... anyways the day was goin good till last block.. i was literally like 10 seconds late and she yelled at me... what the hell..ugh.. i hate mrs. papik.. stupid oompa loompa.. ugh! the only other thing wrong is me and cory... cuz we ain't togther yet.. prolly wont be so i suck end of story... and ty to josh... lol basketball isn't everyones strong suit..ha ha "if there was no dribbling in basketball, id be the nastiest playa..id just steal the ball and run up wicked close and shoot"... nice.. just my style... lol anyways im exausted so im headin out..
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| REALLY bad day |
[Wednesday, November 19th, 2003
@ 3:36pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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depressed |
] |
yay! today was sooo horrible. First i went to dougalls and we have to do this stupid essay and im completly lost on what im doing.. i have no idea whats goin on... that got me mad. Then i went to spanish and since i was upset i started thinking bout everything that has gone on lately( My grandma dying, Kristine, and Rihana being upset, everything Cory is going through, Rachel, and me) Everything hit me and i felt so upset. Then i went to luch... Kristine asked me what was wrong and i said i would talk to her bout it later and she got upset... which kinda topped everything off and i collapsed.. i went to spanish and started crying when i went in the room so i had to leave and go down guidance... it was awefull... i miss my grandmother so much, and im so tramatized by the way she left me.. i can't take life anymore.. things are starting to get to me and people are noticing. Im so upset.. you dont even know how much im hurting right now. Then i came home and talked to Kristine... everything is better with her... and im sorry for not saying anything.. that was my fault entirely.. i just didn't wanna cry in front of like everyone... lol but i guess i didnt end up avoiding that.. but i luv ya... im out for now.. gotta unwind
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| mmmhmm |
[Monday, November 17th, 2003
@ 9:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 nervous |
] |
| [ |
music |
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"Everytime"~ Britney Spears."The Tide is High" Atomic Kitten |
] |
First of all ima start out with Xtina... Gurl don't worry bout anything... when u need someone just turn around and i'll always be here.. right by ur side.. BFFL! Its a longggg story, but i love ya Kristine! MUAH! umm.. which brings me 2 my next point bout Cory.. yeap.. AGAIN.. i have an upset stomach cuz tomorrow ima tell him how i feel bout him... in person.. i dont think i even wanna know what his reaction is, i really don't. I think it's gunna be bad then im gunna be crushed... You all don't even understand how many feelings i have for him.. they're STRONG feelings too.. I wish i didn't have them, I don't want to be hurt again. I guess i'll find out tomorrow if i should shoot myself in the face or not ( not that i'd really do that but u get the point) if shit gets bad then i guess its the forever widening hole of depression that i'll be digging myself into deeper and deeper... oh joy!ugh.. i hate this.. my feelings for him are too strong.. someone just slap me please.. get him off my mind.. i know what he's gotta say isn't gunna be what i wanna hear.. but wish me luck anyways... ima need lots of it.. when i mean lots.. i mean LOTS..im not even kidding. i wanna hope god won't crush me again and maybe i'll have a CHANCE with Cory.. PLEASE!!! im soo sick of being alone all the time, and out of all the pathetic little "crushes" i've had.. this is the umm "worst"? I just want him 2 like me and want me as a girlfriend.. why can't i have that? He's always nice 2 me.. wicked caring.. passionate, affectionate, loving, funny, lovable..and the list goes on FOREVER!.. if i could only get the right words to describe my feelings for him.. then maybe he'd like me and want me more.. ugh.. i hate life
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| howdy... |
[Sunday, November 16th, 2003
@ 9:54pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 confused |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The tide is high- Atomic Kitten |
] |
watz up homies? lol im such a geek... Today i was in one of those.. im extremly ugly phases.. ugh.. i hate those.. it was better when i went 2 walgreens cuz i saw Cory.. yeap him AGAIN lol.. he was walking out when me and my mum were walking in and i covered my eyes and pretended not to see him.. he was like thats really offensive.. i just laughed and walked away.. then i saw him down one of the isles.. i called him a dork.. and he said something like ok im a geek so i guess ill leave, to my mom.. lol. THEn i saw him up at the register, lol he said his stomach hurt cuz he ate too much chinese food.. lol he's too funny.. ha.. I like that kid so much... just ask Kristine.. lol i talk bout him way too much lol... thank you for dealing with all my odd situations and still luving me for it Xtina.. lol MUAH!
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| he he |
[Saturday, November 15th, 2003
@ 11:36pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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anxious |
] |
| [ |
music |
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"if your not the one" - daniel bedingfield |
] |
i liked today lol.. we went to walgreens.. yeap.. ,my babe works there.. he he i saw him talking to someone in the isle.. and i was like hey he goes "what the f.." and stopped he goes get over here.. come here.. whatchya buying? i was like a clock and sum candy hes like aw cool.. then i was looking at christmas stuff and he came up behind me and touched my hair and scared the shit outta me ..lol REAL CUTE ..lol then i was over in the first aid stuff looking at things for my hideous elbow and he walked up the isle and TOUCHED MY HIP.. ahhh he he he.. it felt like a shock of warmth ran through my body.. hes like " boo i got ya" then walked in the back room lol.. i love him.. lol muah! after he did that i had the STUPIDEST grin on my face.. lol im such a dork.... im still scared that i think he likes me.. but im afraid im gunna get hurt.. i really am.. IT SUCK cause i like this kid soo much.. ugh we shall she if something FINALLY goes my way... oh yeah before i head out.. my elbow is worse.. and it hurts like freaking hell.. its more swollen and i might have 2 go get it checked out at the doctors.. idk yet.. but ouch its like a throbbing / shooting pain.. ugh.. well its late and im HOME ALONE cause the rents whent out partying lol.. welp im heading up 2 bed after a VERY fun day.. buh byez.. MUAH!
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| ouch! |
[Thursday, November 13th, 2003
@ 2:51pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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crushed |
] |
yeap thats how i feel today EVERYTHING hurts from my little bike accident yesterday... the best of the day was when the substitute in Spainsh wouldn't let me go to the nurse... FUN! my friggen elbow feels broken lol.. im falling apart as usual.... but it seriously hurt a lot.. and it's still swollen.. ugh.. so fun! I got brusies all over .. a big one on my lower hip.. my knee, shoulder.. lower thiegh.. and the list goes on.. ha ha..I didn't see Cory too much today.. DAMN! lol I like him so much and now i think i'll NEVER have him... SINGLE FOREVER!... I wish he knew how much I actually cared... I hate anyone that treats him badly.. HINT HINT!! I wish i could make him see how much i like him... there's no way to show it though... so how will he know? ugh.. this is what sucks..he says he likes me.. but he dosen't know what he wants...im standing right in front of you.. all yours.. just take me! It's hard to read guys.. i don't get the way they think.. BUT I am absolutly CRAZY bout him... he's always on my mind in between classes.. till i see him..and at home its even worse! and if there's something i wanted to talk to him about.. i completly forget when i see him. lol.It's like he takes away all the worries i have when i see him.. he's awesome.. he's the only person, that when i talk to him i get butterflies... i've NEVER done that.. NEVER.. The more i see him.. the more i want him...But It seems like I can't have him... I can't have anyone! AHHH. GRR. well im out.. my arm is killing me.. I LOVE CORY(duh)
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| what a day |
[Wednesday, November 12th, 2003
@ 9:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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crushed |
] |
1st.. i felt sick cause i haven't taken my meds in 2 days (don't worry.. i took them 2night)
2nd.. I burnt my ear on my straightening iron.. yeap thats me.. the dumb blonde ( whos got some straight hair.. ha ha...)tammy says my ear looked sexy all straight.. but sorry hun.. i ain't doin that again.. lol
3rd... Cory likes me.. but he's not sure what he wants... so someone PLEASE shoot me in the face right now... THANK YOU ( I LOVE CORY.. AHHH)
ok 4th.. the chain fell off my bike and i went right to the ground.. landed on my elbow... yeap.. i gotta big bump there and a good-sized cut.. woo hoo! im battin a million today!
something else to ruin my life even more will happen after i log off this entry.. just watch! UGH! GROSS..
well yesterday i hung out with Kristine and Rihana ( after doing the firm.. which my stomach muscles STILL hurt from today!) and we watched superstar!!. lol " and when i say ooga booga.. you better ooga booga", " what's ooga booga mean?", " I'dont know, but if i say it.. ya better fuckin figure it out!" lol best part!.. then we started making up a dance 2 this song.. if we ever get it done.. you'll prolley see us do it at the dance... And Cory.. if you read this.. well I love ya.. alot.. muah! lol im lame.. that nver works.. but i do love ya... ( whoa ima stop talking before i say something REALLY STUPID!) well im out.. buh byez..
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| HELP ME |
[Sunday, November 9th, 2003
@ 8:31pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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lonely |
] |
this is gunna sound REALLY strange.... ha ha but I like Cory WAYYY too much. If he dosen't wanna go out with me i'm gunna be crushed. I'm SO alone.. ugh it sucks..He's the only guy that has treated me SOO nice, I can't believe how nice he is to me. I just don't think he likes me that way.. which SUCKS!!! He seems like he deserves someone who's PERFECT cause he's so awesome.. I can't think of anything that makes me not like him.. NOTHING.. Why is it that i always like the guys i CAN'T have? it SUCKS.. well if I was lucky enough to go out with him.. I know he would treat me like a queen and i would be the happiest/ luckiest girl alive.... Cory if you read this.. YOUR THE BEST..LUV YA!!! muah!...
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| good day |
[Friday, November 7th, 2003
@ 9:09pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
happy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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" mea against the music" Britney Spears ft. Madonna |
] |
today was a good day.. Cory.. said i was a sweet heart.. hehe, we had a veterans day assembly, i was all hyper and dancing to music all day, i CAN'T wait for the dance in a week.. EEKK!!We went out to eat cause my grand-daddy is leaving for Florida tomorrow.. not fun but hey we had a good time up here.. umm Kristine has States tomorrow... GOOD LUCK GURLIE!!! MUAH!#1... lol afta that we're goin 2 the mall to find cute outfits for the dance... hehe we gunna be sexi mamas!! woo! lol welp im out for now.. byez
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| sorry bout the NOT updating mode |
[Thursday, November 6th, 2003
@ 9:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indescribable |
] |
ok heres all the news bout the past few weeks...
1. I got in ANOTHER fight with my mom bout online
2. went to see a NEW psycologist her name is Tara
3. This Tuesday i went to see her and i broke down crying about my grandma Hall dying.
4.Rachel's Grandfather died.. im soo sorry Rach.. if u need anything im here for ya....
5. Keith is talking to me again.. i guess he was never mad in the first place.
6.Today i went to go see" Scary Movie 3" It was pretty good
7. I like Cory.. hehehe
8. I got in another fight with my mom bout the comp cause shes being gay
9. i almost threw up when i was in the shower
10. I have been sick a lot lately
11. im wicked tired
12. it was my dads b-day Monday
lol thats it.. pretty much.. hmm.. i would love it if i went out w/ Cory.. my first offically b/f.. almost pathetic when you think bout it... but i like him a lot.. who knows.. maybe he'll ask me out!?!?! he he.. anyways.. i wanted to say HI LAUREN!!! hehehehe... umm well i have to finish 2 essays for Mr. Macdougall and then get some friggen sleep.. buh byez
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| stuck |
[Sunday, October 26th, 2003
@ 9:46am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
angry |
] |
here i am.. stuck at home ...alone. So what do i have to do? Go online right? WRONG. I have a time limit on AOL.. I can only go on for 4 hours today, then 2 hours each day for the rest of the week...my mom put a fucking time limit on my screenname so if i go past the hours i get signed off.. oh yeah and even better, she can see what e-mails i read, every screenname on my buddylist, how many ims i recieve from people not on.. or on my buddylist, and the websights i go to.. WOW look how fucking trusted I am huh.. This is so fucking gay.. the one way that I talk to most people is online.. but they put a time limit so i can only stay on for a certain amount of time each day.. and they don't want me on the fucking phone.. wtf am i supposed to do.. be fucking antisocial the rest of my life!!???!! THIS IS SOOOO FUCKING GAY I CAN'T STAND THAT MY MOM DOSEN'T FUCKING TRUST ME AND THAT SHE WON'T LET ME FUCKING TALK TO MY FRIENDS.. FUCK THIS !!!!!!!
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| dance |
[Saturday, October 25th, 2003
@ 12:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blank |
] |
went to a tec dance last night with Kristine and Rihana... It was o.k.... I danced with a kid who was like 1/4 my height he was soo cute lol.. I thought I looked weird.. i wore a skirt with a white tank top and high black go-go boots with a colorful scarf thingy around my neck... but Kristine said to dress weird so i did..lol Suprizingly i got compliments..strange.. yes. Kristine did my hair so it was on the top of my head.. lol i was like 'what are you doing to me" It was funny. I wanted to go the the dance at our school.. I only knew like 7 people at the tec dance... thats not too fun. But on the other hand there some probs when we were there that i would rather not bring up. It was an O.K. dance... not really too much fun.
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| happy half day |
[Thursday, October 23rd, 2003
@ 12:39pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 flirty |
] |
today was a very good day lol. The kid i like is talking to me again (that's a major plus, it was a half day in school, I had a fun day, lol and it was snowing. The bad things that have happened SO FAR are that im cold as hell, and Kristine is having a little trouble with the kid she likes..... That's not cool. I'm still trying to figure out if i want to go to the Harvest Ball, or the Tec dance. I want to go to ours cuz the kid i like is going, but I was gunna wait to see if one of my friends go her umm friend to ask her to the dance. I know ????? would probably never ask me, but Kristine thinks i should to talk him and see what he says. I don't know.. I bet he would say no anyways. I'm gunna talk to her somethime today and then MAYBE talk to him... Not sure yet. I'm also tired as hell lol. so im out
|
|
| yeah |
[Wednesday, October 22nd, 2003
@ 2:49pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
pissed off |
] |
I HATE the way people are treating my friend Cory..im so sick of how everyone judges him and treats him like shit.. ya know what? He's one of the NICEST guys I have ever met, You can't judge him before you even know him... Seriously, If you judge him by listening to what other people say then it's your loss... you will be missing out on a great friendship with an awesome person.. and if you talk about him negitivly around me im gunna tell you the truth.. and if you don't like it tough! He IS a wicked sweetheart.. too bad if you don't wanna believe it but it's true then that's your problem!
Im out..p.s. lets try not to talk bout people behind their backs.. ok?
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|
| not doin good |
[Tuesday, October 21st, 2003
@ 2:39pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
angry |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
and confused^^^ |
] |
ok listen to this... the kid i like gave me his number last wekk.. good right? WRONG! he is ignoring me now.. this makes no sense! I didn't do anything wrong... i haven't said anything or done anything that would make him mad at me.. so why is he doing this to me.. Yesterday he talked to like everyone but me.. im gunna call him today or tomorrow to find out why he's acting like such a jerk.. ugh... why me? On second thought... I found out that Julie McNulty, Terry Hill, and Nikki Ruchouski were ALL talking behind my back.. seriously.. what's with that.. common if you got something to say say it to my friggen face like seriously.. wtf is with that..and Nikki was acting all friendly this morning.. what a queer... im so heated right now... and im upset cause of ... ?????... i still like him for some reason lol.. GRRRRR
|
|
| hmm |
[Wednesday, October 15th, 2003
@ 2:42pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
exhausted |
] |
well today was ANOTHER BORING day of School.. ugh i just want highschool to be OVER with.. I hate it. Hmm and yes he is STILL single which means he's now mine. He He. I act so stupid around him lol. I saw him at least once before/during/or after EVERY BLOCK. He came into 2 of my classes and sat behind me on the bus.. lol but i have a big spanish project to do.. FUN FUN! Oh yeah I also got like NO sleep last night.. Even BETTER
|
|
| he he guess what |
[Sunday, October 12th, 2003
@ 4:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
flirty |
] |
guess who's single again??? That's right uh huh.. im excited.. he he.. im gunna get in so much trouble with this kid i know it.. HES ALL MINE!!!! woo hoo
lol my bro got a fog machine, we're gunna smoke out the house when my parents leave for a party.. this should be fun.
|
|
| Pro-Life Benefit |
[Saturday, October 11th, 2003
@ 6:21pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 loved |
] |
WOW, that night was sooo fun. At first I was having too much fun cause i had tons of things running through my head. Then Sean Forrest came and everything was better. He was a singer, but seemed more like a stand-up comedian. He was sooo funny. There were like 3 rows of chairs in front of him and then a tble off to the side, that's where Ed sat. So, he was like 20 minutes into his act and Ed stood up to take some pictures, he came back and was like "do you wanna sit down?" i was like "i dont know" then he said " lemme go get you a chair" so he got me one and me and Ed sat togther at a table by ourselves.. He was being soo nice. Then when we were leaving he drove me home and we talked on the way back to my house. He said we would talk more ( on the phone) about all my stress. He would have talked to me then but he wanted me to be in the house before 12am.. lol it was like 11:55 so he's like we'll talk don't worry. He's soo nice to me, I feel so blessed to have found someone that makes me feel soo good about myself and tells me everything is going to be ok. He really cares about me, and thats something so special comming from such a caring person. I'm lucky to have such an awesome best friend. I LOVE YOU ED!
|
|
| maggie |
[Friday, October 10th, 2003
@ 3:56pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 excited |
] |
well Im waiting for Maggie to come and pick me up for the Pro-Life benefit tonight.. we are going to mike and tracy's to fill up balloons, make a poster board and then wait for Ed to pick up the balloons ansd we will go to the Knights of Clolmbus with him, She comming now so i g2g ttyl bye!
|
|
| spirit week |
[Thursday, October 9th, 2003
@ 2:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
flirty |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
The I will never wear anything caribbean again! lol |
] |
ok here's the lineup for spirit week:
Monday - Pj's day
Tuesday - Flashback day
Wednsday - Sports day (jersys)
Thursday - Caribbean day
Friday - School spirit day (school colors red and blue)
.. I did Wednsday, Today, and I'm going to be doing it tomorrow too. The only reason I did it today is cause Cory was nagging in the store for me too.. so I did.. but does he come in with anything caribbean.. NOOOOOO lol I'm just playin Cor.. lol well tomorrow is the benefit he he im sooo excited ! i can't wait.. this is gunna be fun. I have to call up half-pint to remind him to pick me up, he said he would write a post-it note but he probably forgot that too.. lol oops.. well Im gunna go call him.. buh byez
|
|
| ugh |
[Wednesday, October 8th, 2003
@ 10:07pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Life sucks |
] |
more heartache everyone.. my uncle Gorge's Dad died on Sunday.. We went to the wake on Tuesday, It REALLY hurt to look at my cousins. Brenda was crying a lot and seeing her in so much pain hurt me a lot, I couildn't do anything... I said a prayer out loud for him so Brenda could hear it. Even seeing my Uncle was very painful.. he was hurting. Jennie started crying when my family was talking about Joe and my grandma (she died 2 years ago from cancer and buried on my b-day) she was o.k. after a few minutes.. I told them both if they need anything to call me.. Hey, I do what I can.. Or at least i try.. ugh.. good news my Cousin Krystal had her baby girl Paris last night.. I'm a GREAT- cousin once again lol but im going to go cuz im a lil upset right now.. too many mixed feelings my head it too confused im lost i need to think
|
|
| lol yeap |
[Tuesday, October 7th, 2003
@ 4:51pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
drained |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Here Without You ~ 3 doors down |
] |
Eddo is sooo funny lol.. I Love Ya.. I called him today to talk about me and my stressful life.. but he didn't pick up.. so i left a lame 5 minute message.. lol but i'll end up talking to him by friday. Friday is the Pro-Life benefit.. That should be fun hangin with them.. its from 5pm- 12am!! lol Eddo is driving me there and back... or at least there. i gotta 90 on a biology test when there were was a 98, 76, and 68 and everyone else in the class failed.. WOW! lol I felt smart lol.. Wow im weird.. i felt bad for Kristine she didn't do too well.. I wish i helped her out... ugh.. i will next time... DON'T WORRY K.. lol .... there i go again.. my pathetic self..ima stop before haughtiness takes up the screen.. bye
|
|
| Monday, Monday, Monday! |
[Monday, October 6th, 2003
@ 6:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
loved |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Christina Aguilera's FIRST CD.. Genie baby.. Genie |
] |
If you didn't realize that yes... it is Monday then well... it's Monday. I talked to Mr.Eduardo for like an hour today.. we were making fun of each other lol it was wicked funny lol.. good times. I'm going to call him later on or tomorrow to talk about me and my stupid stress. But its good I don't hold it in cause it's just going to keep tearing me apart.. ugh. I don't need anymore of that.. I need to get better! lol well I have to go eat byez
|
|
| right |
[Sunday, October 5th, 2003
@ 7:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
aggravated |
] |
today we went apple picking ( me, cj, brenda, mom, and my dad) it started off horrible cause both my parents were yellin at me for no reason... the usual, then we went and i kinda forgot bout everything and stopped crying, went went to this maze thingy and got lost lol then went home. from there, me, brenda, grandpa, and my dad went to the car show at brooks. That was cold and boring yay! came home had something to eat, then went for a "walk" with cj and brenda and the 2 dogs. brenda was running ahead ( when i told her not to) and CJ was already jogging to the store to begin with. Roxie was pulling like a ..... and i was getting pissed cause Roxie and Brenda weren't listening to me.. GRR i was so heated when i got home i just sat in bed.. GRRRRR i cant wait till Friday, i wanna see Ed, he will make me feel better....
|
|
| brenda |
[Saturday, October 4th, 2003
@ 10:41pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 crazy |
] |
well today is the second night brenda is sleepin over, we were beating the crap out of each other lol hitting and slappin, it was funny. We didn't really do that much today though, but we're supposed to be goin apple picking tomorrow! sounds like fun! well im tired ttyl bye
|
|
| cell |
[Saturday, September 27th, 2003
@ 8:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
excited |
] |
I GOT A CELL PHONE TODAY!!! lol thats so pimp.. (don't ask) This is so cool! lol ight im out because my grandpas here.. ttyl (i am sooo tired from these meds.. ugh i slept till 945 and was up for an hour.. then slept till 345pm... thats nutty!)
|
|
| doctors...again |
[Friday, September 26th, 2003
@ 10:45pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
loved |
] |
well today i went to the doctors.. no cancer or anything from the biopsy.. thats good. I have irritible bowel syndrome... he put me on meds and stuff(the medication makes me sooo tired) and i have to walk at least a mile everyday, eat more fiber, and see a stress person.. lol i feel much better with the meds though. I guess the real test is going to be school. Tonight i had the best talk with Ed. we talked for probably an hour and a half. He is so helpful, easy to talk to, caring, and he makes me feel sooo good about myself. He definatly made me feel a whole lot less stressed last night.. ugh thats a good thing though!THANK YOU SO MUCH EDUARDO!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! I can't wait till we go to the Pro-Life benefit in october.. it should be pretty funn, espically since i haven't got to hang out with the Community of Hope since my sisters birthday party. well i have to go because the medication is making me so tired .. ttyl buh bye.
|
|
| ugh! |
[Thursday, September 25th, 2003
@ 8:55pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sick |
] |
what else is new? aside from the fact that i almost threw-up today.. gross... im very tired latly too.. so im out lol it must be boring reading the SAME thing over and over! sorry guys!
|
|
| yeah |
[Wednesday, September 24th, 2003
@ 9:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
sleepy |
] |
im so over him.. hes acting lika wicked jerk right now.. WHATEVER! i've been feeling so sick this week.. i can't wait to go to the doctors. blah!
|
|
| ugh! |
[Tuesday, September 23rd, 2003
@ 2:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
well today i felt like shit! to top it all off i saw the kid i like with a fucking gay-ass slutty freshman.. GRR!!! this sucks... THATS STRIKE 2!!! life sucks.. period. bye
|
|
| surgery |
[Monday, September 22nd, 2003
@ 5:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
groggy |
] |
its over! yay! lol i didn't feel anything aside from the fact that i have a sore throat, where they put the I.V. hurts like hell ... and my nose hurts cause they put i tube in during surgery and it cut my nose... ugh! im all groggy and tired but idk im doin alright. the I.V. was literally a 2 inch needle then about an 1-2 inch plastic piece under my skin! ugh whats with tearing my vein apart... well i g2g eat dinner bbl to tell ya more
|
|
| yo |
[Sunday, September 21st, 2003
@ 12:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
blank |
] |
i talked 2 cj today (he didn't come home this weekend)but he was bein nice bout my hospital thingy tomorrow so that made me feel better too. well im just chillin 2day trying to stay relaxed.. i need some serious sleep though! im so tired though. blah. umm i think im gunna head out though cause i need to figure out something to do for my last day before insanity! lol me and Kristine might go up to the car show today at brooks parkin lot.. byez
|
|
| cars show |
[Saturday, September 20th, 2003
@ 11:56pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
tired |
] |
WOW today was a LONGGG day, But fun. First me, my mom and dad setup a stupid dog kennel for friggen, like 4 hours... in the hot sun i felt gross/ sick. After that my sis came home and we went out for appetizers at Applebees. That was alright.. i wasn't very hungry but i had to eat. Then me, my mom, dad, and Kristine went to this place called the Cliquot club in Milford. That was pretty fun. We had the best waitress lol we tipped her 6 bucks for a 14 dollar meal lol that was funny. 2 salads and 4 shirley temples.. thats the life. Then we left there (all the cars were doing burnouts) and went to a dunkin doughnuts for this guys lil party thingy (long story)that was fun too, the car club ( the burnouts) were all there.. over 20 of them ITS SO COOL! he he their motto is "drive it like ya stole it" thats soo great! lol alright im out cuz its like 12:00 am... im a freak and i need sleep i gotta long day Monday! Ekk! ttyl bye * that was a fun day lol*
|
|
| home |
[Friday, September 19th, 2003
@ 11:54am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
sick |
] |
i should be at school but i felt like i was gunna throw up in school.. i have to go lay down.. bye
|
|
| not a fun day |
[Thursday, September 18th, 2003
@ 5:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 annoyed |
] |
i felt sick and other things WERE NOT helping out.. ugh! umm yeah i like ????? but im not sure if i should even go there.. its a lil too much. I dont know what he's really like though so w/e. One day at a time. we're gunna go out to eat... who know where.. and to be honest.. who the hell cares?!? umm i didn't finish my homework yet. and school sucks. i hate little preppy i need to be perfect all the time people cause all the guys like those friggen anorexic idiots. Some are alright but others are so friggen bitchy, it's annoying as hell.. Cliques suck soo bad its not even funny. ain't im not in a good mood today.. ttyl bye
|
|
| like |
[Wednesday, September 17th, 2003
@ 3:05pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
flirty |
] |
i still friggen like that kid.... whats my problem!?! ahhhhhhhh!!!!!! i like ????? and thats soo friggen stupid omg! i gotta stop these stupid crushes... there gunna get me into trouble lol. well im not feeling too good from the test i had the other day but w/e im over it... the problems pile up... what else is new? im out byez
|
|
| doctors.. AGAIN |
[Tuesday, September 16th, 2003
@ 3:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
worried |
] |
today i missed school and had to get an Upper GI, and an abdominal X-ray. I found out that i have a little reflex. The upper GI hurt soo bad cause it expanded my stomach soo much and now im even more sick from drinking this chalky, sour drink. I also found out that On the 22nd of September.. (in 6 days)I'm going to be under anesthesia, im so scared. Why do things like this always happen to me? why can't i just get tests done the normal way WITHOUT going to specialists and under anesthesia!!! I was scared when he told me that, I almost started crying. I'll be under for like 2 hours. im going to make light of my week and pretend nothing is happening.. YA RIGHT!! IM SCARED!!!Oh yeah IM SICK!! AHH GRR!
|
|
| crush |
[Monday, September 15th, 2003
@ 9:00pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
ok i have liked this other kid for a while now to but then i was playing a little joke and now she likes him and its ruining my chances with him cause she wont back off. but i wouldn't give her his s/n so she got mad at me.. wtf is that.. it got me so pissed but i ain't telling her this cause she'd get even more pissed off. i don't know why shes doin this to me but shes not being a very good friend right now and im gettin so pissed. This is the last time i ever talk to her bout guys. Cause she friggen steals the ones i like
|
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bubble5294's journal
